Cognitive dissonance (noun): The state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, esp. as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.

In other words, that ongoing grating in your mind that won’t stop until you make a decision or act. It’s like the chord at the end of the song that sets you a little on edge until it resolves. In my case, it’s knowing what you need to do, why you need to do it, how you need to do it, and still not starting to do it.

For me, I’ve been struggling with the knowledge that I am running my body into the ground with stress, poor diet, lack of sleep, lack of exercise and any number of other sins I know better than to commit. I have felt so much better when I’m involved in something like the Whole 30 Challenge or running regularly. Other than the losing of weight and the increased wardrobe choices, when I doing something like the Whole 30, I sleep better, I look better and I feel better–all the time. So what is my hang-up? Why can I not just let go of the fully leaded Coca-Cola? The chocolate? The occasional trip through the drive-thru? The myriad of easy and bad choices that leave me feeling sick, give me a headache and keep me from looking the way I would rather look.

The other annoying thing is that I know most anything I like could be modified into something that is more Paleo friendly. Paleo has provided me with the most immediate and dramatic changes in my day-to-day feeling [not bloated, no GI distress, no symptoms of IBS, no headaches, better skin and nails, etc.] and that’s why I refer to it here as the way I know I need to be heading.

My schedule in the summer is insane. Ten hour workdays are not uncommon. Falling into bed completely exhausted and forcing myself from it in the morning is the routine. I can barely plan to keep my clothes clean let alone to map out meals, trips to the store, and prep/cooking time. And yet, people do it every day, I’m sure. My kids are home in the summer and both love to do things in the kitchen–I could enlist their assistance. And, my husband has eaten and enjoyed nearly every Paleo entree I’ve made, as long as I haven’t told him it’s Paleo. He thinks Paleo is “too hard”, time intensive and it robs him of things like cheese. Mmmkay. Again, usually if I cook it, he eats it and away we go.

I’m thinking if I make myself accountable here, even if no one is reading, I might accomplish two goals: 1) to keep my blog updated regularly and 2) to finally put myself on a path to not be wishing I would just do something already.

I have tried the Whole 30 twice and ended up planting my face in a plate of spaghetti and meatballs long about Day 16. Perhaps if I can better plan, log my progress and keep myself on track somewhere other than in my own mind, I will stick it out and reap the benefits of the entire plan.

I know I have a chicken in the freezer and so, my friends, I will put this roasted chicken recipe on my list of meals I will be making once we launch the Whole 30 festivus on this blog. I mean, if you can convert a Julia Childs’ perfectly roasted chicken recipe to be Paleo, you can pretty much do anything you set your mind to do. I wonder if Ghee will work in place of straight up butter?

Nom Nom Paleo has fantastic recipes and is so visually engaging that your mouth will water when you browse through the blog. The iPad app is legendary–I only know from reading others’ comments as I am the luddite without an iPad.

Stick around…this could be miraculous or high comedy…or both.